"Clothes do make the man!" Black Hawk Down and the Gamers Generation

Day three and we continue our Bosnian/Croatian method acting - PT gear yet again. Needless to say it looks and smells a little ripe around here. I think it's a third platoon issue because first, second and fourth platoons have their uniforms. They look imposing – We look ragtag. They actually begin to form up in tight cohesive units. We, on the other hand, gather more like a herd of cats. I'm starting to think Patton was right on the money in enforcing strict uniform requirements for his troops. (They even wore ties during the desert campaign) We march to the field as a "unit" for weapons training familiarization – our first attempt at formation movement. I use the term formation for descriptive purposes only, yes we are in the Navy and no - this does not come naturally – We are more adept at navigating single file through tight passage ways. Some how we manage … as organized as, well, a herd of cats.

It turns out the field is more of a piece of land attached to a parking lot with trailers. We break off into several groups and spread out to various areas that have been set up with assorted props to learn the fundamentals, and I mean basics, of 9mm and M-16 training aiming and movement -sans ammo - probably one of the best decisions the cadre has made to date. Some of the folks head off to the trailers with their M-16. I hear firing inside and assume it's a fortified indoor shooting range. After finishing the rotation in about 2 hours we standby for a long wait for our turn in the trailer. I am beginning to understand the theory of "Stand by!"

For lunch we get a unique surprise, Capt Jeff Struecker was at FT Jackson and came to speak with us. If the name sounds familiar then you know your military history. Anyone who has seen "Blackhawk Down" (One of my favorites) will know he was a SSgt. and truck leader in Somalia during the highly publicized incident. Meeting him and hearing his experience first hand both energizes me and raises the hair on the back of my neck. Extremely sobering – watch the movie. He has become a Chaplain if that tells you anything.

Many hours of standing by to stand by later I get my chance to experience one of the coolest uses of tax payer monies ever. Hidden inside the façade of a Texas tornado magnet (trailer home) is a highly interactive video game; complete with a shooting line of M-16A2 weapons that mimic the real thing. On the back of the trailer – a solid wall of video. You shoot - the game responds recoil sound and all. It even has per lane instant replay and video analysis to educate you on the shortcomings of your shot. Wow - the Army really understands how to train the gamer's generation. I learned more about my shooting proficiency in that 30 minute session than in 30 some odd years of rifle ownership. I'm hooked and no matter its 17:00 and time for chow, I don't want to leave. Even after hitting 40 of 40, I, and a couple other shipmates… err battle buddies, request another "training" opportunity to make up for "deficiencies" in our shooting skills.

Here Struecker in his own words:
Staff Sgt. Jeff Struecker,
http://inquirer.philly.com/packages/somalia/who.asp#STRUECKER

Life in the land of Hooah. You’re in the NArmy now Sailder!

The barracks – this is no way to live a “quiet” or private life. On a nightly basis the loggers start their chain saws by the dozen and methodically cut down entire forests. Coupled with a few nightly conversationalists (the kind that talk in their sleep) we have a regular industrial noise hazard zone. It’s so loud in fact my ear plugs hardly provide any comfort. I had better sleep on the 2nd Deck of an aircraft carrier - one deck below the arresting wires.

When we received our clothes yesterday, we turned them back over to someone to sew on the name tags and the insignia. (You know- the ones we all stood in line for 3hrs to buy? See 03 DEC entry). That said we are now in our PT gear and wearing our new body armor and Kevlar helmets. Silly doesn’t event describe the look; something between uncomfortable squids and rebel fighters from the Bosnian conflict. More than once I was called “The Sniper” from the Owen Wilson film “Behind Enemy Lines”

We line up in what can hardly be called a formation and receive our assignments.
Drill Seargent (DS) “3rd Platoon Attention” :
Squids (Us) “Night stalkers”
DS: “NOT LOUD ENOUGH! Maybe you’re not awake yet!?! Maybe you need some encouragement to get the blood boiling!?! Around here we boil our blood by doing 50 push-ups I say again 3rd PLATOON ATTENTION!”
Us: “NIGHTSTALKERS!” We must be around 110 decibels - We may not be able to create a formation worth a damn but we sure as hell aint stupid. I don’t know a squid one who wants to do push-ups in this cold weather wearing this crazy body armor.
DS – “Company… A TEN CHUN” :
US – CHARLIE ROCK! (This is our response to the company commander)
DS – Rock Steady
What an odd form of communication...

I suppose I am officially in the Army now. And there is an entirely new set of customs and lexicon for me to take on. Its enough that I need to got to another country and learn their customs and learn Arabic and Farsi but needing a translation guide for the US Army is just crazy. Luckily these knuckle daggers have a limited vocabulary. Just about anything can be summed up with one word; When in doubt just say “HOOAH"(Low guttaral tone is best). - an appropriate response to just about anything.

For your convenience I have created a dictionary for other new terms:

Too Easy, Hooah? – Do you understand?
Good to go – All clear
General Issue - One size (does not) fit all. Usually provided by the lowest bidder.
Johnny Go Fast Gear – anything but the general issue gear "this stuff is cooler than your one size fits all crap." Usually available from the Highest quaility Highest priced provider.
Type – General Issue descriptor used to follow every noun. i.e. One Public Affairs “type” One Navy Officer “type”
Stand by to Stand by – hurry up and wait (any typical Army day)
We impart knowledge: prepare to be impressed – Drill Sergeants are smarter that you.
Skull busters - bullets
"Throw some Skull busters down range hooah"– shooting bullets (by the way this activity is a lot of fun)
High Speed / Low Drag – something far to cool to be good for you or me.
Battle Buddy/Combat Buddy – A shipmate or partner who keeps your 6 safe. (Watches your ass)
Trooper – Um… I spose thats me... I spose I aint your standard issue sailor type anymore. (smirk)
Hump that gear Trooper - Move that heavy bag of unecessary GI issued gear from one place to another.
Field Spouse – Someone to screw around with in the field (See Battle Buddy)
Power Point Ranger – Army’s New High Speed Low Drag special operator – highly trained soldier prone to combat injuries such as paper cuts and carpal tunnel. Purple Hearts authorized in combat areas.
Go to War weapon – Your new significant other. The weapon you are assigned to hump to theater. Note this thing never leaves your side without some sort of security watch i.e. I’m married to my weapon till death or divorce do us part. abandoned weapons = base/camp lock downs! serious stuff.

More to come - this is an ever growing list. ;-P

Is it Christmas already? Army style? - Fort Jackson

You’ve seen the movies… A new recruit goes through first days of boot camp disoriented being screamed at by their drill sergeants and eventually being inundated with what seems like endless bags of supplies uniforms and tools for which there surely is no other use than to weigh me down during some sort of forced march torture… Well that’s not just the movies. It really is disorienting. Coupled with the fact that you’ve just “slept” with 60 other complete strangers in various stages of sleep apnea due to breathing issues (SNORING) which means you didn’t sleep at all and you are herded around like cattle eventually arriving at supply depot where you are handed unrecognizable gear and told to dump said various items into the dark depths of one of 3 large duffel bags assigned at the very beginning of the line. 250 plus people all acquiring basic Army general issue gear. You stuff the items deep down into the bag and just know that you may never see it again. You will however “hump” this bag all over the world; a fate worse than the mission itself. Gear like extreme cold weather parkas. Makes sense to me – never know when you’re gonna get caught out in the dessert and that blizzard will roll up on you. I’m sure I’ll be the envy of every local when the white out begins. Follow this up with a long wait in the field for lunch. On the menu – MRE (Meal Ready to Eat). Delightful. I’m lucky enough to get Beef Ravioli. Not really as tasty as I remembered during my camping/back-packing days. I suppose then it was a novelty - Now it’s my reality. I may end up eating these damn things a lot.

Next comes the Rapid Fielding Initiative - cool war fighters gear for the 20th century. Camel Backs, Oakley sunglasses, Rector knee/elbow pads, Kevlar Helmet, we’re stylish. My active imagination starts working – I can see the movie title now ...

Combat Skateboarders - Thrashing Baghdad!

OH HELL, what's this - IBA (Interceptor Body Armor) with SAPI (Small arms protective inserts) plates? This is the equipment I’ve been dreading… 30+ instant pounds compacted into a stylish camo vest. More waiting… I think in all their efficiency I’ve determined that we will be standing-by to stand-by A LOT. We finally get back to base around 20:00 just in time to be assigned our weapons. In a silly extremely unprofessional rush we are pushed through the armory in line being handed (hmm more like thrown) M-16 rifles and 9MM pistols without much familiarization. UNSAT! I’m fairly comfortable with these weapon systems but the way a couple of folks are handling them – its just a little more than disconcerting. It’s been a long day that started at 04:00 and ended at 21:30. Were given a meal consisting of formed Canned BarBQ sandwich - chili Mac and Pringles then sent to the rack. I can’t wait– the idea of 60 snoring men full of chili Mac!

For what we are about to receive... Columbia SC – Fort Jackson/Camp

After a nice 4 hour wait sitting on the floor of baggage in the Columbia Airport, I and about 70 other Sailors were shuttled to Fort McCrady where we then rolled into Admin office for quick ID check then into a class room for check-in and billeting and a quick indoctrination to the Army. Apparently there is only one real word we need to know… “Hooah”. We were then divided out and assigned to our platoons and barracks. I am now in 4th Squad, 3rd Platoon, Company C. I receive my sheets and a general issue green wool blanket and told to head to barracks 3938 to choose a bunk. I have no less than 61 to choose from. Doh! Open bay barracks with community showers. Sort of like summer camp for kids that don’t grow up. Efficient, this is not. Next comes a trip to the chow hall followed by a stop over at the shoppette for mandated uniform insignia (not provided by the army) One check out line 260 people in a store the size of a 20 by 15 room. You do the math. And afterwaking up at 04:00 and not getting to sleep in my “rack” until nearly 23:30 I’m more than a little frustrated and tired.