Oh the humanity oh the irony…

NBC’s decision to release a post-mortem video of a murderer only validates my concerns about Western Media. Where is the responsibility and compassion for the victims? Perhaps TV producers and their viewing public have become so desensitized that we no longer know right from wrong. Both sides are at fault. They are looking for ratings and they know everyone will watch. Have our lives become so mundane that we must focus incessantly on the tragedies of others? Just like “rubber-neckers” at an auto accident we are so consumed with seeing anyone else’s misfortunes.
More bizarre is the ironies generated from this tragedy… I sat in the boss’s office today watching a split screen of CNN and Al Jazeera.
CNN – “Breaking-news” of an incident that broke 3 days ago and has been running for not stop. (Not so breaking anymore)
Al Jazeera – 1 minute briefing of a mentally ill student and 29 minutes of other just as important headlines.

How about these Ironies:
Doesn’t the self-produced delusional diatribe released by NBC resemble the “last goodbye” martyr tapes released by Suicide Bombers? Tapes that Western Media typically refuse to broadcast while Arabic media quickly push out as credible?
Contrarian as usual Al Jazeera took the high-road: deciding not to broadcast the post mortem rantings of a murderer and condemning the environment that creates such horrific personalities. What happened to their Martyrdom?
What does it say when you can get more substantial, balanced, and responsible Western Media style news from a Pan-Arab outlet?

Other things to consider:
How many angry youths are now complimenting their weapons cache and disturbed attitudes with a “must-have” video manifesto?
How long until Al Qaeda takes responsibility and praises the actions of their South Korean “brother.”
Just how different are we from the Middle East?
In my desire to defeat extremist in all their forms I suppose I could travel half way around the world to fight fanatical young men with delusional thoughts acting out their homicidal ideas. Oh Wait?!?

Here’s an interesting idea… how bout for once we take a page from the people here in Iraq now do after they lose 200 + people in one day and just let the people in VA grieve without all the many weeks of intrusion and deconstructionist sensationalism.

Blood Money: turning tragedy into promotion

The happenings at VA-Tech only illustrate that Baghdad does not hold a monopoly on senseless acts of violence. Using Anna Nicole as an example we will have 24hr coverage of this incident for at least 3 months. Regardless it is sensational enough that it will take some of the pressure off us for at least a week - probably two. Now I haven’t had too much time to really watch the news on this event but I have seen more than enough of the over exposed “student come CNN reporter.” Someone who happened to be in the right place at the right time with his cell phone to capture a bit of ruddy video. Trust me it is little more than an audio file. Additionally I have seen this new pseudo reporter giving exclusive interviews of what he witnessed which appears to be little more then speculation on the events inside. He couldn’t see much… he was outside with his little cell phone. So why is he suddenly out there so visible as the lead spokesperson? I fully expect he now has an agent and a movie deal. Wait… Is that a new wardrobe? It’s a sad state of affairs that he is using a tragedy to get his 15 minutes.

I have also seen several clips of students wearing branded matching school T-shirts during interviews. I clearly understand that they wore the shirts for solidarity but it dawns on me that those shirts sole purpose are to market a product – VA-Tech. Now I love beating the drum as much as the next marketing guy, but come on… On this occasion I think a black arm-band or simple scarf provides a lot more taste. Wearing matching marketing T-shirts is just too much a slap in the face during what should be a grave and solemn moment. This isn’t a prep-rally after all.
There is a point were shameless marketing becomes inappropriate manipulation of unfortunate circumstance. Hopefully all this will backfire but unfortunately I’m not sure people will see through it. After all this is America; home of Obsessive Compulsive Viewers and the worlds best marketing and promotion minds. I know many of you (Mr. BUA) are saying Mr. Pot Meet Mr. Kettle. Notice you’re both the same color. OK I suppose I am somewhat responsible but even I have my limits.

I mean let’s think about the ramifications here. Strategically where is this going… marketing packages for post catastrophic events such as a high profile car bomb, suicide vest or IED?
“Joes Auto Repair – If we can fix it you don’t want it.”
“This vest sponsored by Al Qaeda custom clothing – serving Iraq, Iran and Syria since 2003.”
“Searching for a loved one? Google The worlds most powerful search engine.”

Perhaps this place has affected my already morbid sense of humor to a point of no return but now more than ever I feel some lines must never be crossed! Lines that I believe are starting to blur…

“Heart-wrenching”

I wrote a briefing that used that word… as in the challenges the Iraqi people face have been “heart-wrenching.” The word didn’t make the final chop. Quite possibly for the right reasons. I have no issue with having my work edited. As a matter of fact I welcome revisions. The final product, I feel, always ends up so much stronger when the team inserts their various experiences and perspectives. So today’s briefing went on without that word and as a matter of fact the engagement went great. More over the specific phrase, edited by the team, was so strong and pronounced that it become the quote used in many major outlets. So the team once again was right on the mark

After our engagement we came back to the office to find multiple car bombs with a tremendous amount of Iraqi casualties. As we always do, we jumped into action and begin to ply our trade. However I saw something in all of us. This event really spent us in some way. I thought about our recent experience out with the Iraqi people and I can say that for me this is the first time those numbers are not merely figures on paper. They represent real men, women, and children who were simply trying to live their lives. Soccer players. Studio technicians. Proud Moms. Eager Dads. And nosy smiling kids on their bikes. It all brings me back to one simple word… "Heart-wrenching!"

Vegas or Bust!

One thing that is certain around here is that everyday someone is coming and someone else is going; esp. those short tour Air Force types. You meet all sorts in this small constrained universe and sometimes for reasons explainable to few you build close bonds with folks that may very well last a lifetime. If you’ve read this blog for any length of time you’ve met a couple – Mr BUA, Free, Dave… Well the day has come to say Fair winds and Following seas to yet another such a friend. Tonight Capt Kj heads home. As has become a sort of tradition for me and since she is a glamorous blogger in her own right I asked her to guest blog on her exit. Based on our high-minded, intellectual conversations I fully expected a profound expose summarizing her time her. But true to her blogging form she gave me... Well she gave me exactly what she should have… A true Capt KJ Blog perfect for Glamour Magazine. See you on the other side sis...

OK... you asked for it. Not sure it's that funny, but anyway, it's a snapshot from the mind of a very strange and disturbed individual who uses wars as a way to recover from ended relationships.

My war of breakups

I thought that, in my guest blog for Hollywood, I'd address something sophisticated, in depth, and meaningful. Yeah, so for most people, this whole Iraq war has been about big things--oil, industry, dictators, trans-national terrorist groups, government conspiracies, impending fundamentalist theocracies (take your pick: Islamic or Christian), and that kind of thing. For me? Not so much.

I was discussing this with Hollywood and another friend a week or so ago, and realized that this war has been about my breakups. I remember the countdown to the Iraq War because I'd just broken up with a boyfriend the night before the ultimatum was announced. During the resulting sleepless nights, I kept the TV on and was quite cheered--OK, maybe the word is "distracted"--by signs of chaos and destruction... oh, excuse me, "shock and awe" that lit up our screens all night long during the initial phase of the war.

By the time the "good TV" portion of the war was over, I was done with the worst of the shock and awe of breaking up with the guy and I was ready to move on into the rest of my life. I was going to be moving (from Maryland to Ohio) in a couple months, so my time and energy went into that.

However, my involvement in the war personally was also precipitated by a breakup. This breakup was not my idea (yeah, he sprung it on me out of nowhere--from my perspective, that is), and it was correspondingly hard to get over. I moved (from Ohio to Alabama) and continued to find myself hung up on the guy, so much so that I never really moved into my apartment (after six months I still had unopened boxes sitting around and nothing actually on the walls), and it was getting into that time of year when, the year before, we'd been starting up our relationship...

So when the opportunity to deploy opened up, I jumped on it. I knew that, heck, if I can't avoid the one-year-anniversary of... you name it... then I'd at least be able to be somewhere that would keep me too busy to think about it. And so I landed in Baghdad. And at the year anniversary of my breakup, here in Baghdad, I thought about it briefly (I think?), and then moved on. A day later we had a rocket attack and I forgot all about it.

So this war has started with a breakup and then REALLY started for me with... a breakup. So I'm thinking I need a breakup to announce the end of the war. I'll work on that.

Capt. Kj

Prison Break…(Part 2)

We pass the make shift check point as the “guards” stare at what I’m certain is an unusual site for them - two troops and an civilian in battle rattle carrying notebooks not rifles. Pen is mightier then the sword? Screw that… I miss my M-16A2 right about now. We continue our trek but now we have picked up a “tail” from the impromptu cp, who is making no effort to hide the fact that his is following us. He is complemented by several Iraqi’s jumping roof top to roof top pointing and watching. The two Iraqis hiding behind a car just ahead and to the right don’t make us feel much better. My little situational awareness voice is definitely talking to me.

Rules of Engagement are clear… Do not fire unless fired upon. I unsnap my 9mm and keep walking. No sense in at least not being prepared. We have a mission as silly as it may be. To be fair there is a large taskforce of US forces about a couple hundred meters before the initial check point we came too. So relatively speaking we are safe. The problem is that the large taskforce is about a couple hundred meters before the initial checkpoint we came through so we are currently isolated and, in a fire-fight, cut-off. The situation now seems so ludicrous the three of us can’t help but crack jokes. By now I’m thinking this is more like Donald Sutherland, Clint Eastwood, and Telly Savalis in “Kelly’s Heroes”… three soldiers behind enemy lines walking down an empty street to meet up with a waiting enemy.

As we come up to the car with the two guys “hiding” I am relieved to see they have a set of tools on the ground. They are fixing the damn car. Never mind that this car is blocking a road and their crouching tiger act looks as suspicious to us as we there stationary toting soldiers walking aimlessly down a deserted street are a curiosity to them… they are just fixing the damn car. Just when I think I can breathe the guy behind us moves up on us and points to us to turn down the road way at the car next to the two guys tinkering on the ground. As I turn the corner I look up to see… An Alley way… An Alley way with a bombed out building at the dead end… A bombed out building at the dead end with no windows and many potential sniper’s nests. Yep… We have now passed directly into hell and this is “Black Hawk Down!” Our impromptu guide urges us on so we tell him “fine you go first we’ll follow.” We walk another 200 meters to a hidden corner and there to the left is a street that leads to a large court yard with a crowd of people…

At first glance I’m taken a back unsure of the reasoning behind the horde. One thing is evident; they are as surprised to see us as we are of them. Just on the other side of the large gathering I can see the bosses’ truck so we continue walking forward. At least we’re in the in the right place. All is revealed as we clear the building on our right. Football… (Soccer) the rest of the world’s national past time. And it’s being played here in the middle of a city on a raised field with green grass - GREEN GRASS! I miss green grass. Talk about absolutely unexpected. This doesn’t look like a war zone at all. Everyone here seems to be having a good time… uh except us. We suddenly had a “One of these things is not like the others” moment. We remove our helmets and try not to look so threatening. We catch up with the rest of the team and begin the long day of production shoots and media engagements in production news studios that could have been Anywhere USA. We completed our work and headed back to the HMMWV where I greet a few children with a smile of confidence. Time to convoy back to the “Prison of Outlawed Children.”

Lesson learned? These are just people trying to live their lives the best they can in extremely adverse conditions. I won’t even try to deny there are dangers here but I guarantee there are places in the US where I would also prefer to have my battle rattle and a M-16 Musket.
The reality is people are really the same all over. Kids will be kids; soccer players - soccer players and families - families. And we all possess our own “special” eccentricities. But at the end of the day, we all just want a safe place to live, play and grow old with dignity. The fact they are out here living their life gives me hope that Fardh Al Qanoon really is making a difference.

Prison Break…(Part 1)

As the four happy children wave at me through thick window of the up-armored HMMWV’s it occurs to me that I haven’t seen children in a long time. By that I mean really noticed children; especially children who notice me and/or children who stop and interact with me. We don’t have many of them in the IZ. As a matter of fact, as I’m thinking about it, it’s sort of like that village in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang where children are banned. But these curious and friendly children get off their bikes, come to the windows and start talking and smiling with our second seater. It makes me think of the way I acted when I was growing up back home; a nosy brat. Only this wasn’t home… This was Downtown Baghdad – Actually this is better known as the infamous Haifa Street. And we are here to continue our mission of engaging Arabic media.

Today – we are scheduled for a co-hosted interview on Al Iraqiya with the spokesman for Iraqi forces in Baghdad and Fardh Al Qanoon; essentially my bosses counterpart. The trip out of the IZ starts out as usual but this time we're not headed down Route Irish… This time it’s the check point that my hooch mate, who works with IZ security, always describes as one of our more “interesting” areas. The moment we get past all the concrete fortifications I am amazed… Here is a bustling city. This can be Mexico, Czech Republic, Belize, or any third world country. A little more driving and we pass a large taskforce of US soldiers in their HMMWV’s followed up by an Iraqi CP. Razor wire… concrete barriers… crapped out buildings… Iraqi Police and Iraqi regular Army combined… this is an 80’s war movie set if I ever saw one.
This is where it gets interesting. We are told that we have to dismount and walk the rest of the way because our HMMWV’s can’t pass. The boss’s SUV with the Iraqi Gen gets the OK to pass through. We on the other hand get out of the perceived safety of our vehicle and start out on an adventure. Our convoy troops dismount as well and begin walking with us as an armed escort. We get maybe 50 meters before were told by an Iraqi Army Guard toting an old AK-47 that our M-16 musket carrying Personal Security Detachment can’t keep their long guns locked and loaded in this Iraqi controlled area. Hmmm… conundrum. By command orders they can’t be out here without their weapons locked and loaded. What we have here is a bit of a Baghdad stand-off as the boss’s vehicle is still driving on up ahead of us. We won’t keep him waiting. The three of us continue walking without our PSD. As we watch the boss’s vehicle turn a corner and pull out of site I start to have a real “Black Hawk Down” moment; a small under-armed detachment walking down a road to who knows where surrounded by who knows what. We come to the side street where the vehicle turned and there is bunch of ragtag civilians Iraqis types standing guard, more like lounging, at the entrance to this roadway. I wont bother to convey which militia they are most likely “unofficially” affiliated with but I’m will say its probably not that enthusiastic about our presence. Unfortunately there is no vehicle in sight - the SUV has sped off. We ask how far and get something that sounds like a mile… Whisky Tango Foxtrot?!?

Now that unfortunately sounds more familiar…

It’s been a busy day at the ranch. We had a suicide bomber in at the Baghdad Convention Center and DOD announced possible extensions to our tours. This made for a lot of work in my new job. The crazy thing is that for the first time here I actually did a lot more of what I was trained for. Not only writing and prepping but also engaging. Going proactive. We got the chance to go forward and lead the mission. Now that, I believe, is making a difference.

The convention center isn’t close to us but we had to go to a building next door to do some business moments after the event. There was something very surreal about going next to the scene of a crime while it’s still in effect… and let’s be clear that’s what this suicide bomb is… It’s a crime. It may be an act of desperation but it is still a crime and not an honorable way to present your grievances. Regardless of a War on Terror or a conflict of ideas, murdering innocent civilians with a suicide vest is inexcusable. Having to research the investigation materials after being near by was that much more unsettling and bizarre. Now I’m not excited about the extensions… I want to see my friends and family as much as any other trooper and honestly I am pretty much tired of being here – cough and all. But other than these high profile attacks I can see small glimmers of hope coming out of the new security operations here in Baghdad. If things continue in a positive manner and three more months makes all the difference between continued atrocities or eventually stopping suicide car bombs and vests, then I suppose it’s a small sacrifice. Now if we can just get Iraq’s neighbors to play nice…

Sounds unfamiliar…

During my fine stay here I’ve heard a lot of things. Low flying Helos, Car Bombs, rockets, mortars… you name it. However last night I heard something very unfamiliar. For a few minutes I thought it was a sustained attack somewhere in the city. It was an ongoing rumble; then another and another. Are we launching a full scale attack? If so that’s a lot of shelling for such a sustained sound. Even though I was trying to sleep – very late night – I had to investigate. To my surprise as I walked out of the hooch I saw brilliant flashes in the clouded sky and of course more of the deep sustained rumbling. Then came the rain! I love a good rain storm; especially at night. How amazing is it that I’ve been here so long and heard so many disturbing sounds that I forgot what thunder sounds like and what lightening looks like. I was so excited I just stood in the rain remembering a moment in my childhood when I stood out on the ranch next to my father as a storm blew in from the north. What a therapeutic moment.

The other great thing… All this water will pack down the dust that’s doing wonders for my “Baghdad lung.” So I thought… when I woke the next morning I walked out to a sky that was so burnt orange it would make most any University of Texas supporter truly believe God is a Longhorn. Unfortunately it just made me wheeze, choke and hack all that much more. So much for the therapy: Hook Em Horns!

I spose I’m becoming desensitized…

My R&R to Qatar was a good thing. The transit from here to there and then back again was not. You see mobility around here is not an easy thing and cannot be taken for granted. It’s not like a drive to your basic airport. It takes real work to come and go out of BIAP and the rest of theater for that matter. Convoys… Combat Landings… Constant changes to itineraries… all in the name of security. I can’t and won’t go into to much detail but the fact that it took roughly 40-48 hours to travel both ways with about 6 hours of heavily interrupted sleep on each side should give you some idea. At the end of the day it’s a real pain in the A**. The convoy down route Irish is an adventure all its own. I’m not sure I will never complain about the LA traffic to LAX again. At least I’m not being shot at (errr… at least most days).

On our trip back from Qatar we had a group of new Air Force types join our well rested group for transit. The AF folks have a very different rotation schedule than the other services. Usually half the time so they are always coming and going. Now we all wear uniforms… all have the same basic gear… wear the same battle rattle… basically we all look somewhat the same. So how could I tell they were “green?” They had that agitated nervous look of new troopers approaching the dark abyss of Iraq. I heard odd edgy comments, they made some stupid mistakes and they did everything (I mean everything) by the book no matter how frustrating and impractical it may be. Yeah… 10 seconds and I had this group sized up as fresh replacements. For some reason I a couple of them really caught my eye. Hmmm I wonder… Then I reflected back to 4 months ago when I was making the same trip and how our inbound group of replacements acted the same way; tense, anxious, and definitely impractical to the point of stupidity. Now I’m an old hand with this silly system. I don’t wear all the unnecessary gear, don’t bother with the much of the school trained non-sense that doesn’t apply to the reality of boots on the ground, and realize that if it’s my time then what the hell – It was a great ride.
Most telling was the convoy ride to the IZ. A few of these folks were in my ride and they were huddled up with a real nervous white knuckle grip on the chairs and a look of quiet terror in their eyes; hiding from the windows hoping not to see anything yet anxious for a first peak of anything. Yeah – I recognized that look too. Dave and I both had it on our first trip down Irish too. Desert training really terrorizes the hell out of you and then when you’re in the real moment you are so geared up for the worst. When nothing happens you’re almost let down. Now I’m riding 2nd chair… looking out the window acting spotter… and carrying on light conversation with the driver relaxed and ready to roll if needed. I’m aware but comfortable - This is just what it is. Even when we have an unscheduled delay and sit highly exposed for several minutes No biggie – It’s just the job. Sides I’m 46 hours into this journey and it’s really late or early. I don’t much care about the boogie man - I’m just eager for my bed.
12 hours later I return to the office… Odd as it seems I’m actually happy to be here. And look over there - The couple of replacements that caught my attention many hours before. Some how I just knew they were our replacements I don’t know how - I just knew it.

Yeah I’ve changed and in a few months these green folks will see and experience things that will change them too. It’s the nature of the beast.

Welcome back to the Suck Hollywood!

I was asked in passing today “LoveBreed – just how many countries have you been to in the last couple of weeks?” I had to think a bit on that. “Four – Four countries sir…” “Well welcome back you’re looking refreshed.” That doesn’t tell the whole story. I can try to catch you up but I’m a bit short on time. I think you’ll just have to wait for the Journal. That said I’ll give you a brief review of the past three weeks.
It all starts with a severe case of the Baghdad Crud (flu like sickness) – A trip to the clinic netted me some over-the-counter meds and a couple days of bed rest in my hooch to prep me for an upcoming trip.
Then I had several close calls with indirect fire – Yes it is like the movies (sort of) - No it’s not fun! Lost some friends to that IDF and an IED – Yes Virginia this is real.
Next…a trip to Kuwait, then UAE, followed up by a trip to Qatar. The trip took us into the belly of the beast – Our MNF-I Spokesman did live interviews with Arab media and even Al-Jazeera. Now this is what I came to do – Make a difference!
Next I heard excerpts from my handy work read by speeches given from 1 and 2 Stars to White House Spokesmen to the President. Wow! I guess they liked my work.
After the trip I went back to the clinic for some hearing problems (those damn combat landings cause a lot of ear pressure) I was scheduled for another flight in a couple days. What I thought was a case of the Baghdad Crud turned out to be initial stages of Pneumonia. This netted me a trip to the CSH for Chest X-rays. When I asked “But what about my ears?” Doc laughed at me – “Your hard headed Sailor - Hearing is the least of your troubles!” Had to go through some “rehab” and got lots and lots of meds. I’m also now the proud owner of an inhaler. Nice! So much for a good running time on my PRT.
And this led me to a 4 day pass back to Qatar… Via Kuwait which turned into over a week stay. Additionally Travel in this area of operation is a real pain - 48hrs of grueling work in both directions at all hours. Let’s just say I’m getting real good at convoys. I got lots of sleep and have some great observations to share with you but for now it’s been about 2.5 weeks since I‘ve been in my hooch so I’m going home. Hence, why you haven’t heard from me in a while - That and we have to maintain stringent OPSEC during hellish moments so there’s really not a lot we can talk about. Not that I want to tell you much about Hell anyway! I’ll fill you in on camels, green troops, and the wonders of Guinness Stout in the desert later. Good night, Adieu and Ma salaam alakum…